Medical students participate in a Gross Anatomy Laboratory as part of their first-year training towards becoming future physicians. Many view this as a “rite of passage,” as these willed-body donors are often our first and most intimate patients.
In the beginning weeks of this course, I’d often looked into the white cotton-covered (to maintain respect) face of my donor and wondered who he was. In the concluding weeks of this course, I’d also begun to wonder who I had been before I met him.
Hello.
Who was I?
I didn’t comprehend whether I was anxious to meet you
or meet parts of myself yet unknown.
Who am I?
Day 1:
Who are you?
I waited with bated breath as your blue door opened,
as the white curtains over your eyes parted.
Who were you?
Day 4:
I couldn’t help thinking that you must’ve had such a large heart
to allow strangers so intimately into your resting place.
And the thought was confirmed as
I held your heavy chambers in my hand.
Day 16:
I thought how much strength it must’ve taken to bid your loved ones goodbye
and travel into arms of the unknown.
And the thought was reinforced as
I witnessed your sinewy muscles that must have been so strong in years past.
Day 20:
I felt how much warmth you must’ve given to the world
to trust in the kindness of those you had never met.
And the feeling intensified as
I felt the strength of your grasp.
Day 25:
I believed how much good you trusted was in the world
to give others the ability to see inside your thoughts and feelings.
And the belief reverberated as
I held the hemispheres of your being in my hands.
Day 32:
I trust in the kindness and knowledge you’ve imparted
to allow myself, a well-meaning stranger, to become a better version of myself.
And these days will stay with me in the coming years as
I pass on your strength and faith.
It was so humbling to meet you:
the intimate details of who you are,
who you were,
and the memories of you within who I am now.